Larry's 30th post. Stuff You Should Know About

Hi guys, it’s Larry this time.

I hope some of you guys liked what we did in the last chapter that Marc posted. We haven’t had a lot of comments about it, but it was super fun doing it together. I hope we get to do it again one day. It was cool seeing what Marc just wrote show up on my iPad right after he wrote it. Maybe we should have left in all the shit that went down between us doing it, but Marc said it had to go, not respectful to Sam and Johnny. Not that we said anything bad, it was more about us screwing around having fun with each other. We did leave a lot of that in the post though, sometimes we strayed way off the topic, and it would be confusing to anyone reading it. If you liked any part of it, please tell us so we might do it again one day. Okay do it for me, I loved doing it more than I thought I would. Now I can move on to my shit!

STUFF ABOUT MARCUS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT

I wanna talk about what Marcus is going through lately, and it’s not in his head, okay. Well, it’s part of his head, I guess. And I wanna talk about our Pops and Joe too. Who knows maybe something else will pop into my head while I’m writing and that will be in here too. I guess some of you guys know that’s gonna happen with me anyway. Like I said, move on.

I’ll talk about my Sweetbabes first. It’s been about a month now that he’s being treated for something that scared him, and really scared the shit outta me too. I know it’s gonna be okay to tell you because he told some of the guys we write to already. Besides, he said this chapter is on me since he worked so hard on the last chapter editing all the stuff we wrote to make it into a posting that made sense. 

Maybe I should start from the beginning right around his last birthday in June. You know we have been sleeping together for a long time now, so when one of us gets up to go pee in the night, it doesn’t wake the other one up anymore. At least he doesn’t wake me. But one night, I heard some really bad sounding coughing coming from the bathroom maybe around 3 in the morning. That was not sounding good at all, so I jumped outta bed and ran into the bathroom to see what was going on with him. Marc was bent over the toilet spitting into it. He had a lot of mucus to get outta his throat and was coughing really hard to do that. I thought, well I guess he had a “fur ball” to get rid of and almost left the bathroom to go back to bed. Anyhow, I don’t know why I had to look into the toilet, but I did, and Marc was spitting up something red. I thought it was the cool toilet light we bought that changes color as you get near the toilet at night, but it was red, and the light wasn’t red or any other rainbow color. No he was spitting up blood and I felt the blood rush in my own body. Like any movie I’ve ever seen when blood comes out of the mouth you end up dead. Well, not if you are in the dentist office, but in the movies you’re dead or dying. 

I think we were both kinda shaking after seeing that, so I put my arm around his back to walk him over to the sink to rinse his mouth out, but he made the sink all red with blood, even his beard around his mouth got red too. That didn’t make me stop shivering, all I could think about was call 911 before it’s too late. Anyhow, before I did anything I told him to rinse out his mouth with the water we bring into the bathroom every night. He did but the blood never stopped coming out of his mouth. Then I said, maybe drink some water and see what happens. IDK if that was the reason but he stopped bleeding, or maybe ran outta blood or something. That helped me feel better but poor Marc was shaking a lot and really scared, maybe he was thinking what I was thinking too. He never told me that, but I bet he was. 

After he cleaned his face and beard from the blood, I just grabbed him into my arms and we just hugged for a long time, I mean I was so fucking scared for him, and me too, I guess. I didn’t let go of him until I felt him stop shaking, or was it shivering, it wasn’t cold, just nerves, I guess. I walked him back to bed with my arm around his back and got him inside the bed and covered him with a sheet and then walked around to my side of the bed. When I climbed back into bed I moved over to his side and just spooned him from behind. Trust me, this was no time for my dick to get hard, it didn’t. (If it did, I’d be wondering what the fuck is wrong with me!) I just hoped that all the bleeding didn’t mean anything bad for him. I thought maybe we should at least call the advice nurse at Kaiser, but he didn’t want to at that time of night. So I made sure we did the first thing when we got up. I don’t think I ever got back to sleep after that scare. But old Marc was back to snoring big time! But I swore to myself to make sure that we phoned Kaiser first thing in the morning to see if he should go to the ER. And then I made sure he got an appointment to talk to his doctor too. Just because he stopped bleeding doesn’t mean that everything should be okay now.

I could see that Marc was still sleeping like nothing happened at all, kinda wondered how he could do that, I’m still a fucking wreck with no sleep! Anyway, I headed to the shower to get ready to leave if we needed to go to the ER that morning. When I was finished in the bathroom, I returned to our bed to see him still sleeping and I wondered if I should wake him up or not. I chose not and went to sit down and just watch him for a while. I think my watching him somehow got to him, and he woke up and lifted his head up off the pillow and looked right at me and said, “Why are you just sitting there looking at me that way?” I didn’t answer him but asked him how he felt. He said, “Okay but concerned about the blood.” I told him, “Ya, me too Marc, that’s not cool you know.” I didn’t want to tell him what I was thinking about blood and death. I asked him if he was hungry enough for breakfast and he said he was, but nothing special, or difficult to swallow. I told him I’d make him some soft scrambled eggs.

I guess some of you guys that read our blog but are not writing to us might not know that Marcus has been having a problem swallowing for a while now. Sometimes, food gets stuck in his throat, and he just spits it up in the sink or his napkin. I don’t blame him for not talking about it, it’s not something I’d want to talk about either. One day some time ago, when we were watching TV together in the family room, he took some Tylenol for his arthritis pain. It was those white tablets not the capsules style, he said it got stuck in his throat and he tried to cough it up, but it wouldn’t move. I watched him drink a whole glass of water trying to swallow it, but nothing. Anyway, I grabbed his glass and ran to get it filled up again for him. If I didn’t see it with my own eyes, I’d say he was bullshitting me. Marc was finally able to cough it up into his hand and that fucking pill was as dry as a bone! Like that whole glass of water had no effect on it at all. How could that be? But I swear it’s true! I asked if he was gonna try again, and he said, “Fuck no!” And I don’t blame him. I do remember saying that there are other kinds of pills like capsules that we could try for him. That morning, we went to a Walgreens Drug store and found some of their own brand generic Tylenol in smooth capsules and that’s what Marc has been taking since then. Marc did email his doctor about that some time ago and she said she would schedule some tests for him to take.

Anyhow, to make the story a little shorter, Marcus is being treated for his condition and has for almost a couple of months. The first couple of weeks he was being tested by some specialists at Kaiser and that’s still going on with therapy. There’s a whole lot more that I could write about this, but I guess I should tell you what they told him and me what it was. “Silent Reflux!” I was with him when he said that he never has heartburn and never needs to take antacid tablets, not since he found out about drinking acid-free coffee and treating tomato sauce with sugar. Marc also puts some half-and-half in his coffee to stop any heartburn. One of the specialists we talked to said that Silent Reflux is something you can’t ignore because it can lead to some very serious problems later, like the ‘C’ word. I think we both said it at the same time, how the hell do you treat something that you don’t know you have! She did say maybe it’s spitting up blood at night, always coughing up phlegm because of postnasal drip, both of which was what Marc was dealing with. The doctor told him the blood more than likely came from scar tissue that he hacked up from the severe coughing that night. Since he hasn’t had any bleeding since then, I guess she was right. Besides, no one seemed that concerned about the bleeding except us!

Anyway, by the end of July 2023 Marc will have finished six weeks of treatment which was to take Omeprazole 40Mg, (it’s a generic prescription for Prilosec OTC.) 30 minutes before breakfast and 30 minutes before dinner. Then in August one week of just 30 minutes before breakfast, and then one week of every other day for breakfast. If he can swallow better, then he is through with the treatment. If not, then he starts another set of treatments. Marc says it’s a lot easier to eat and swallow now, I hope he is telling the truth. I know that he has to take small bites of food, chew it good, and drink water between bites. He does that, kinda has been longer than his treatment, I’ve noticed that a long time ago. I just never said anything about it, kinda figured it’s a Marcus kinda thing. 

Okay, I guess I covered that for you, and you can bet it’s a big reason why Marc has asked me to do more writing for the blog for some time now. I don’t mind writing for you guys though, I love getting letters from you that make me feel good about myself and that my writing is getting better all the time.

Maybe I’m not so done with it yet. You gotta know by now from the blog, that we’ve been connected as best buddies for so many years. I know for sure that what I felt about him started for me when my appendix burst, and I was in the hospital for at least a week. We were Al and Mark back then and had no idea we’d be like we are today. But I knew one thing for sure, I had a real brother for the first time in my life by the time I was released from the hospital. I don’t think I expected it to get sexual like it is now, but I knew I loved him more than anyone I’ve ever loved before, maybe even my wife. Maybe I’m saying that because of what’s going on between us right now, but hey it is what it is! I do know one thing for sure, loving him so much and seeing all that blood was the scariest thing I ever had to deal with. Maybe I might have some space to talk about what’s going on next door in this chapter too.

IT’S FUCKING HOT AS HELL OUT HERE!

I guess it’s hot as hell in a lotta places in the world though. We have been having days at 110 F degrees a lot even in June. July has been the hottest yet ever! I can’t wait for August and September! (I think that’s called sarcasm okay!) We get the hottest after 4:00pm to around 6:00pm and then it slowly gets a little cooler. But this month, not so much cooler. I hate to tell you what it’s done to our pool! We haven’t had the solar on for a long time now. Now I know why Marc never put in a hot tub! The pool is a fucking hot tub lately. Like I mean over 90 degrees and sometimes higher. The pool only feels nicer after about 10:00pm or so. Kinda reminds me about those times I’d sneak away late at night to swim with Al a few years ago. I should clear that up with, after our trip to the lake cabin over four years ago. Before that, Al always tried to get me to ditch my clothes if it was after dark. Nope, I made sure it never happened, hahah. Stupid me huh? I really wanted to do that, but I just couldn’t find the guts to let it happen. Anyhow, he was never to know that until way later on. You know, if I’m thinking like when I was Mark or now as Larry, I haven’t a fucking clue why I was so not gonna let him get me naked in the pool, I mean if he really wanted me that way he should have tried harder. I don’t know who I didn’t trust more, him or me. Anyway, it’s fucking hilarious now, considering we never go into the pool with swimsuits or anything other than skin. Maybe I thought he was playing a trick to see if I was something other than I said I was. Like that’s ancient news around here, just pops into my head sometimes about back then and now. Anyway, there are only two times a day that we get to swim, right outta bed and before bedtime. At least we don’t have any fires going on this year to deal with. The smoke in the past kept us inside almost as much as the heat. 

From what I hear, climate change is making this happen, I’d call it “Climate Weirdness.” Maybe those people who can’t stand to hear about the science of climate will accept my term instead. It’s fucking scary and I worry more about my kids and their kid's future. What are we doing to make sure they don’t face even hotter days and months when they get my age. It’s fucking scary and it’s even more scary that some people don’t think it’s important to deal with. Anyway, I’ll get back to my story now.

SOMETHING ABOUT THE OLDER GUYS AROUND HERE

I don’t know if I should put another section title here yet, if you see one, I guess I changed my mind. Anyhow, since we are swimming before breakfast lately, and for the days that Pops stays at home with us, we invite him to swim too. Every room in the house is connected with Echo Dots from Amazon. It’s something that Marc did long ago, we can use them to talk to any room in the house and other things too like play music and ask questions. Anyhow, the Echo Dot in our bedroom is on the night table on my side of the bed. When we are ready to head to the pool, I use the “Drop In” feature to contact Pops’ room and tell him what we are up to and invite him to join us. His bedroom feels like about a mile and a half away from ours on the far side of the house, I could yell at the top of my lungs, and he’d never hear me! That’s why I love the little speakers so much. Besides, if he needs help, he finally learned how to do the same thing to alert us. Anyhow, he hasn’t missed one day swimming with us while he’s been here. 

Since our bedroom is closer to the family room, we enter the backyard that way, it’s where the pool steps are located, we’re not jumping in here unless we want to knock ourselves out doing that! Hahah. Pops room is near the office area, so he comes out of the office door and gets to dive into the pool. I’ll never forget watching him for the first time doing that and seeing his shorts around his ankles as he dove in. I even giggle whenever I write about that too. I guess you gotta know us by now when it comes to swimming, only naked guys leave the house to go for a swim, we got nothing to hide from each other, so naked it is. At night it depends upon what we are doing and what we are wearing, I guess. I just love seeing Pops enjoying himself with us that way. It’s not a turn on or something like that, it’s just a good feeling I get knowing how much he likes being with us as much as we like having him around us. I don’t think we ever think about the age difference at all. I know I don’t. 

Pops is the kinda guy you buy a coffee mug that says, “World’s Best Dad!” I guess everyone who reads our blog knows I was taken away from my parents because of abuse, I grew up without parents, and I guess I learned how to deal with that over the years. I know now how much I really wanted a father to teach me all the shit that boys need to know how to do, like throw a baseball, learn how to fish, whatever. And now I have a REAL father, the best one ever, but I only had to wait my whole life to get one. But I did get one, and my son got a grandfather, and my grandsons got a great grandfather. Pops wanted that as much as us, it was a match made in heaven and we all know that.

I am very affectionate with Pops now. I know we had a shaky past when I didn’t understand the ass grabs that he got away with on me a few times; maybe it was something guys did sometimes, I never did though. It wasn’t too long before I figured if he thought he could get away with it, I could too, so I started giving it right back at him. Anyhow, he didn’t stop, so I didn’t either! Hahah. But that’s hardly a thing with us anymore, sometimes he just pats my ass walking by me, I figure fair is fair, so I give him one right back! I do hug him a lot more now, and I don’t care if it’s a naked hug in the pool or not, anyhow with his gut lately, we don’t need to worry about our junk ever touching each other, hahah. Oh ya, I kiss him too, like both cheeks in the morning and when any of us head to bed at night. I even got Marcus doing the same with him. Now with Marc and Pops, well they are like real family since Pops is his Godfather and guardian since the loss of Al’s parents long ago. They have a different relationship, but that’s been changing and its Pops doing it for him. See I have made a difference in their lives as much as they have in mine. Cool huh.

WE HAD THE UNCLES OVER FOR A BBQ

I haven’t written much about the other guys that have been a part of our lives for a while. Pops old buddies Tony and Bill who live up in Auburn, CA. That’s not far from us at all. I don’t remember if we’ve ever told you that Pops spends about half a week up in Auburn with his buddy’s, he has his own bedroom there since Tony and Bill share a room now. Pops just wants us to have more alone time without him around. I love having him around it’s not something we’ve asked for or even let him think that. He’s just being a cool dad for us. They spent the Fourth of July with us, and it was fucking HOT too!

I get to talk to Bill a lot more than Tony; Bill has a real connection with me that goes back quite a while now. I like him a lot, but Tony is fun to be around, he’s the most Italian guy here, and that’s saying a lot since Pops and Marc are Italian too. I bet Tony would be a great standup comedian, he’s always got a joke and when he’s in the room, it’s like he’s back on the stage again. I love it; besides he makes me laugh so much it hurts my cheeks sometimes. His jokes are always kinda rank and maybe for guys only, IDK. Anyhow, they said they would be bringing oven cooked St. Louis Ribs and we could finish them off on our BBQ. And that we could make whatever we wanted to go with the meat. It’s a good thing our kitchen is large because the three of us were making stuff before Bill and Tony came and they joined in too. We have this really big square island in the kitchen that we can all work at without getting into each other's way. We won’t talk about the mess that five guys can make though.

When the guys arrived for the BBQ, Bill came over to me for a hug and never took his arm away from my back, I guess he was happy to see me, huh. That’s okay I guess because Tony is all about Marc anyway. Poor Pops hardly got a greeting, I guess spending a few days with them every week gets a little old. I know the guys really like coming here and spending time with us, usually for a few days at a time too. When all the greetings got done between us, I was still with Bill’s arm around my back, I guess he really missed me. I had my arm around his back too. I moved in close to his head, and that’s not easy since he’s way taller than me, to ask him how things were going between Tony and himself. I think I said, “Things still cool between you two?” Or something like that. He whispered in my ear, “Yup, I like dick now too.” Got me to belly laugh making the others wonder what was said I bet. They all looked at us laughing our asses off and Marcus said, “Care to let us in on the joke?” We both just said, “Nope!” And then laughed even harder. (Maybe I should tell you that whenever the subject got to the two of us living the “Gay Life” instead of our “Straight Life” I’d always get a laugh with, “Go figure, that I’d like dick!” I had several ways of saying that, but the liking dick never changed.)

I know Marc will not let me get away with that later tonight; I was gonna tell him anyway. I was still talking to Bill and IDK, it just came outta me that I was feeling sad for Pops, he’s got nobody for himself. Bill said that I shouldn’t go worrying about that, Pops is doing fine. Now it was my turn to ask him if he’d like to fill me in on that. He said, “No, not really.” But he did remind me that Pops spends half a week up in Auburn with them and that he better shut up on that before he gets in trouble with them. Man did that ever get my horny imagination up and running. I looked Bill right in his eyes and told him, “You old horn dogs!” Bill laughed and said, “Just look at what you guys can look forward to some day!” Oh, Marc is gonna get an earful tonight, that’s for fucking sure!

IT’S BBQ TIME!

After the BBQ, which was great, those guys can really cook! We didn’t go crazy with the rest of the meal, just some salads because it was gonna be hot and we had three kinds of salads, I made a potato salad, Pops did a pasta salad, and Marc made his great strawberry spinach salad. Doesn’t that sound good? We cheated and bought ice cream for dessert, like I said, it was hot out, and ice cream was perfect. 

Anyway, we did hit the pool around 7pm when it got less hot. I want to say cooler, but that didn’t happen until much later. Do I havta remind you that when it’s pool time around here, our clothes disappear into little piles in the patio. One thing changed having so many witnesses at the undressing, we have cleaned up our act and actually put our clothes neatly in a pile too. But it was more fun just stripping and dropping our clothes as we headed to dive into the pool. That kinda ended when Pops moved in. Well, that’s not really true, the days that Pops is not here, we kinda go back to our old habits.

Before I write what Tony said to me outside at the pool, maybe I should tell you that I’ve made a decision to do a lot more manscaping of my body. It was my idea, no one but me. I just wanted to feel better about wearing a tank top out in public or the shirt that I cut the sleeves off. I’ve been hiding myself for years and I just don’t want too anymore. But I don’t like being stared at or watch people laughing or giggling while looking at me. I’m sorry but I still can’t deal with that very well. I know being a furry guy with muscles should make me happy, but it doesn’t. Well, don’t worry I’d never shave everything off, but I have been trimming it down a lot, especially my upper arms and definitely my shoulders and back of my neck. Marcus helps me do the areas that I can’t reach, and he doesn’t complain or anything. So, any area that gets too dense now, I trim it back some. It just makes me feel more like everyone else, well except Pops, but that’s another story. He only complimented me when he saw me the first time all trimmed up. He knows what it feels like to be different. Gotta love the dude! 

Well anyway, back to the guys seeing me at the pool after dinner on the fourth. Bill never said much, except that I was looking even more buff, well I’ve been working out a lot more here than I ever did at my place. Tony on the other hand was all about my new look. And it wasn’t all happy talk. He wanted to know if I had a horrible accident with a lawnmower. If he wasn’t laughing at the time, I’d consider that rude as hell! I didn’t expect anything at all, maybe I should have. Anyway, Tony is a hairy guy too, but not like me and Pops. I guess I should be happy to know it’s that noticeable and that I can go out in public and feel good about myself. Tony told me, “Okay, turn around so I can see your ass.” Man, he sure is pushing this! Anyway, I did turn around for him and I was gonna bend over for a laugh, but changed my mind at the last minute, figured I’d be hearing about it from you-know-who later. Anyhow, I didn’t do anything back there, that’s Marc’s playground, whoops, TMI. Tony said, “Thank the Lord you didn’t touch that gorgeous curly-haired ass of yours!” Okay, chalk up another fan of my curly-haired ass, hahah. Well, anyway I told him why I wanted to do it, and he kinda understood. But he did say that I had nothing to worry about, that I was gorgeous just the way I was. Ya, I’ve heard that more than enough, I just don’t believe it, that’s all.

Anyway, I got the feeling from Pops that the guys might like to have some time by themselves in the pool, and maybe we should leave. It was a feeling, not a request, okay? I noticed at times Tony was having a quiet talk with Pops, like low enough to not be heard. I bet horny Tony had some plans that might not need us to be around. Like I said, just a feeling I had. But that’s not all, I have my ways of letting Marc know what I want to do with him you know. This time it was done under the water with him and it sure as fuck got his attention. Like I’ve said lots of times, I do like dick, remember, hahah. Now do you have the idea. Oh ya, Marc got it, and it didn’t take any convincing him that we were going to call it a night with the guys. Actually, it was him who told them we were heading inside too.

I didn’t need to tell him what I was thinking about the guys, I think he got it, or he was as horny as me and wasn’t gonna waste one minute. Anyhow, maybe hanging around a bunch of naked guys messing around in the pool, kinda gets to you. So far that hasn’t got old for me yet; well, in my whole life before moving in with Marc, that never happened. From what I’ve seen in the old pictures of the guys back in the 1960’s, maybe it’s not so new for them, but it’s still a fucking turn on for me. I hope it never gets to the point where it’s boring and not fun. I told the guys, “Just because you don’t see the neighbors, they probably can hear you so late at night, so keep it down kids.” We all had a good laugh at that, and I bet they knew we knew; we didn’t, just guessed.

I figured the minute we got behind the double doors of our bedroom that Marc would start asking questions about what was going on with me and Bill. Well, he did, but way later. He had something more important to do with me and it started in the shower room even though we’d been in the pool. At least our pool is so clean you never feel like you gotta get a shower afterwards. Thanks to Joe. Anyway, maybe getting your dick played with under water right in front of three guys, got Marc to thinking what was in my mind ever since we all got naked. Ya, being around a bunch of naked guys does still work for me. I had a thought for a second about what the guys would think if Joe was ever in the pool with us. Ya.

THINKING ABOUT OUR FAVORITE “JOE” THAT’S NOT LIQUID

It was a couple of weeks ago that I noticed a note taped to the office door. We don’t spend that much time in the office anymore, and sometimes we go outside from the family room. Lately it’s been so damn hot we don’t go outside until late after dark. Anyhow, I did go and get the note and it was from my friend Joe. It was an apology for coming much earlier than normal and leaving before we were up. He said he couldn’t spend time with us for a while because of the heat later in the day. I guess he figured he could get everyone done before it gets really hot outside. That’s between 4 and 6 pm out here and lately it’s been as high as 110 degrees outside. Bitch huh. I like spending Tuesday morning with him even Pops and Marc does too. I decided that on his Tuesday visit last week, that I’d get up early and meet up with him. I just about made it too, I figured maybe he’d be here around 6 in the morning, but it was about quarter to six when he came. But I was up making coffee anyway, and I was the only one up too.

I had all the kitchen lights on so he could tell someone was up, I figured he’d be checking that. Anyhow, it worked, I heard a knock on the kitchen window, and it was him. I went to let him in from the office door. Joe was happy to see me as much as I liked seeing him again, not that it was that long since we all got together. I think it was because I know it’s gonna be hot here for a long time now, and maybe I wouldn’t get to spend some time with him until October. Like it’s not even August yet. Joe put out his hand for a shake and I just pulled him in for a hug, I told him we are better friends than just a handshake. Joe gave me a big smile, at least I thought we were. I had my arm over his shoulder while we walked over to the kitchen for some coffee which was almost ready. Joe apologized for not bringing donuts with him; I told him forget it, no problem.

Joe told me about his plan of getting done early in the day while we are in the middle of really hot days, but I already knew that from his note that he left a couple of weeks ago. I told him that was smart thinking, and that we will always be here for him when the weather gets better. I also told him to just text me if he’d like to come over after work if it wasn’t too hot out, he could come here anytime when we are here.

I promised him that he could leave to do his job anytime he wanted, but at least have a cup of coffee with me first. I told him I was already missing him that’s why I got up early that morning. That got to Joe, I could tell because he looks down to the floor when he gets kinda emotional. Then he looked up at me a gave me a smile again, like it was a thanks for being his friend smile. But that morning wasn’t gonna be a long visit, he said he had booked a lot more stops on Tuesday during the heat and he just had to get busy after the coffee. He asked me if I’d meet him again next Tuesday at the same time because if I would, he wouldn’t book too many clients in the morning. I didn’t say anything, just took out my iPhone and went to the calendar app to make the entry and then I showed him. I only asked how long I should book for him, he laughed and said, “Long enough, okay.” Ya, I get it, so I put 3 hours after he left me. When he left through the office door to do the pool work, he asked me if I’m still okay talking about embarrassing things. I told him, “As long as you are.” I stood inside the office to watch him for a few minutes, I knew if I went outside to talk to him while he was working, it might be too much of a distraction for him. But I wondered what new embarrassing thing he had in mind to talk about. Well, that’s not true, I have a pretty good idea of where this is going, I always wondered when it would actually happen. Maybe next week.

Pops was the next guy up, I bet he smelled the coffee and came into the kitchen to get some. Well his bedroom is a lot closer to the kitchen than ours. I saw this bed head guy in off-white briefs that should have been tossed out long ago, scratching his ass and saying, “Hey.” I said, “Hey yourself, good morning Pops. You want some pancakes for breakfast?” You bet he did and told me only if he could help me. Like I’m gonna say no. Pops asked me if I had some trouble sleeping since I was up before normal. I told him I got up early to meet up with Joe. He asked me how Joe was doing, and I told him that he was booking all his clients early in the morning, so he’d be done before it gets too hot. Pops was good with the answer and never said anything more about Joe. Good, I was hoping it wasn’t gonna be a question-and-answer session all about Joe.

Marc joined us soon after and he was all dressed like he was ready to leave the house. I was surprised and kinda let out a “Wow” seeing him that way and asked him if he was headed out for someplace. He said, “Yeah remember, we are both going to my therapy session and then have breakfast out.” Whoops, bummer, here I am making pancakes with Pops for all of us. I asked him if we could just have lunch out instead and maybe go grocery shopping afterwards, and he could have pancakes for breakfast. If anything, Marcus is flexible or is that versatile, hahah. Pancakes won and he wasn’t mad that I forgot. Teach me not to put shit into my calendar app when I first know about it.

Since I’m talking about Joe, I’m gonna skip the day I had with Marc, nothing that interesting to talk about here. Just a typical day for us, other than a trip to Kaiser. I just wait in the waiting room for him and then we talk about what was said. He’s doing much better in case you wondered but still has some time left before he stops taking his meds. One of us will write more about that when we know more. But back to Joe this week.

I told Marc what I was up to this time and that maybe he’d like to join us but only after I have some time with him to see what he wants to ask me about. All Marc said was, be careful what you say to him. He said that because he knows what I’m thinking it’s gonna be about, and he is concerned for Joe. I hope he’s concerned about me too you know! Ya, he does, don’t worry. I told him that maybe if it is about what I think it’s about, maybe he could help me say the right things.

NEXT TUESDAY MORNING EARLY

I got the regular knock on the kitchen window along the way to the office door, but this time the coffee was already made, and I bought some donuts the day before. We both hugged at the door this time without him looking for a handshake. I repeated putting my arm around his shoulder as we headed to the kitchen only this time he had his arm around my back, and it wasn’t just loosely there, he let me know he was holding me. Ya, I liked it too. I really like the dude and it just feels right being kinda affectionate with him.

When we got into the kitchen, he laughed and said, “You bought donuts! Cool!” And then he said, he should have but wasn’t coming from that direction this morning. I told him, it was about time that we bought the donuts anyway. I even bought them from the same place ‘The Donut King’, and bought some apple fritters he likes too. I liked the custard filled ones, Pops too, so I bought extra so we’d have some later. Marc allows himself the donut holes, maybe one day when he thinks he’s skinny enough he’ll break down and have a big boy donut! Hahah. No, I know better than that, I understand what he’s going through, and I support him. I take it as a compliment to me that he wants to look more like me, but I do miss his soft belly though.

Joe told me that he could stay here for about an hour or so, but not much longer or he’d be working in the heat of the day. I told him he could go whenever he felt he had to go; I was gonna like the time we got together even if it was only a half hour. Joe told me that’s why he likes me so much, that I understand and respect him. I didn’t know what to say about that, other than maybe that’s what good friends do for each other. 

I asked him about how his wife was doing and how he was handling it. I don’t want to say too much here in case he ever gets to read this blog, but there is still a danger for the baby, and hopefully not the mother. Anyhow, I’ll leave that part alone, but it does relate to what he is concerned about. Joe said that he’s been practicing what he wants to ask me but only because of the time, if he had more time maybe he could work up the courage to say what he wants to say. I told him, come on buddy, we must be beyond that by now. Just ask me, I thought we agreed not to be embarrassed between ourselves. Joe said he knew that, but it’s still kinda difficult. I figured maybe I should ask him first, “Joe, is it about me and Marc and how we are?” Joe said, “Yes, but there’s more.” I looked at him over the cup of coffee that was almost to my mouth, and said, “I’ll answer any question you have, even if it’s hard, besides I’m no expert on this stuff.” Well that helped him, because it just started to come out of him, one thing after another before he stopped for me to answer. I don’t think I can write it out like Marcus could, so I’ll just let you know what we talked about for a while.

These are some of the things he wanted to know about. How I could be married for so many years and then change like I did or maybe we both did. He asked about how long it took before I was able to let Al know what I felt about him. And if Al had told me how he was feeling at all. He definitely wanted to know how I handled my attraction to Al and if it affected my marriage. He was told before about our going on a weekend trip together, and that there was some sexual stuff going on between us, so that wasn’t a question to deal with. He did want to know what we did after our trip; did we feel guilty and try to stop it before it went further. Well, those are some of the questions I remember, I’ll probably remember more after I finish writing about it though. But before I started to answer some of them, I had a question for him. “Joe, are you having feelings for us or me that you don’t know what to do about?” Then I told him, he could feel safe answering me honestly, I love having him as a buddy and I’d never hold whatever the answer was against him. Joe said, “Thanks, I needed that from you.”

I could see that it was very difficult for Joe to get to his question now that it’s okay to ask. I think, maybe I know, what comes into your mind is a lot different than what might come outta your mouth. I think about lots of stuff, that I still have a hard time getting outta my mouth, even with Marc and that’s just stupid sometimes. I usually get it out somehow, but I have a lotta years being Mark and uptight about this kinda stuff. Joe has asked me before what it was like having sex with a guy. Was it anything like with a woman. Ya, nothing like with a woman, especially a woman like Ellen. But that wasn’t what he wanted to talk about, it was a little different this time.

I tried to help him the best I could, you know I’m still a little green at this shit. Well, maybe not that green anymore, hahah. I just took a deep breath and said, “Are you thinking about what it would be like having sex with us?” See that wasn’t so hard for me, now let’s see how hard it was for him. Pulling Band-Aids off again. He actually admitted to that, I guess I made it a little easier for him by asking him first. Man, did he stumble all over that one though. I just told him to stop, it’s okay to talk about it. And then I told him, “Don’t you think I haven’t had the same thoughts myself?” And then I said, “It’s okay to have these thoughts, it’s normal when you are attracted to someone.” Man, I sure was hoping what I was saying was the truth and wasn’t gonna backfire on me. Where is Marcus when I could use him? But I could handle this. Joe is attracted to me; I knew that a long time ago. That’s what I was afraid about for so long. I hoped I wasn’t making that happen on purpose. I can’t help what people feel about me, good or bad. Marc is totally about me as much as I am about him. But then, Pops has his way of dealing with me, and Tony well what can I say about horny Tony that you can’t figure out yourself.  Bill likes me in his way, not everything means let’s go fuck, okay! 

I talked to Marc about Joe before, and we both are sure that the lack of sex because of his wife’s pregnancy is a big factor for him. I mean getting naked with a couple of guys you are attracted to, must be a bitch to handle for him. At least I have Marc when we are alone; then I think about Pops is in the same situation with no one to go to. And then I think about the three or four days he gets to spend with his buddies every week, maybe he isn’t so alone, huh.

I got the feeling it was gonna be easier for him if I asked the questions or brought up the subject first, and I was right because we were talking more after that. I’ve been talking to Marc about Joe a little more lately, and we both were thinking that the poor guy must be climbing the fucking walls because of how long it’s been since he and his wife has had sex and how much longer it might be yet. Anyhow, I did bring that up to Joe the best I knew how without hurting him, but he laughed at that one, and said that he was surprised that we were thinking about him that way. I told him I’m sorry if that’s not cool, but we do care about him and his wife. He just thanked me for caring and said that he and his hand had a great new relationship lately but hoped it would end soon. I took a chance since I didn’t think that subject was over and done with and just said, “Do you imagine being with one of us during those times?” You wanna know something, I don’t think I could have asked my old buddy Al that question years ago, and I just came out and said it to Joe so easily. Anyhow, the answer was “Yup.” Of course he said it was me he thought about; well I asked, and he told me. Now what?

Anyway, since I brought up the subject I told him something that was really true, it was about how turned on I got after being around my new buddy Al when our friendship began years ago. I didn’t understand it, (I think I really did, just didn’t know how to stop it) and I couldn’t get him outta my head when I was having sex with my wife, and that’s the fucking truth and it was fucking scary. 

Anyway, I told him that after our weekend together at the lake and being naked with him and that we had sex together, the guilt I was feeling about it was not easy to deal with. We both wanted to be together more than ever and didn’t know how to do it and keep it a secret from our wives. Joe asked me how I handled that and it’s getting really easy to know why he’s asking. I said having sex with my wife I was always hoping that I wouldn’t say his name or something worse during sex. Anyhow, even with worrying about slipping up, the sex was the best I had with her in a long, long time. Joe said, “Really!” I told him it was, but it didn’t make me feel less guilty about it. I thought Ellen might ask what was going on with me being so horny, so I kinda cooled it a bit the next time. Or maybe it was that I jacked off earlier in the day helped. Joe was really into listening to what I was telling him and looked amazed most of the time.

I now believe the biggest issue for Joe is the guilt he feels from the attraction he has for me and how he’s handling it. I told him that maybe we should have Marc join us and he could give you how he handled the situation himself. Anyhow, I told him if he is feeling guilty, don’t, it’s normal and okay to be attracted to someone, and that fantasy is not such a bad thing. And then I pulled off my own furry Band-Aid and told him that after I saw him naked with us in the pool, I kinda got my own “big dick” fantasy too. (I told him that too, not just here in my chapter.)

Not exactly what I was looking for, good enough.

Joe said that maybe he wasn’t so surprised about that. Now I’m wondering what I did or said to give that away. Maybe staring a little too long at that big dick of his? I did you know, kinda hard to miss seeing it and it was nothing like I’ve ever seen in person before. Anyhow, I told him my fantasy was about what it must be like having a dick like his. And maybe I’d like to know how it feels if only for one day. Anyhow, I told him that somehow I’m not embarrassed telling him that, I guess because I trust him so much. I hope he takes that as a compliment to him, that’s all. After I told him that, it was when he told me how much of a turn-on my furry body and muscles were for him. I told him maybe now we are even-Steven with fantasies. I didn’t know what else to say but it seemed to work. Joe said he missed being touched more than anything, and I let out a nervous little laugh which was not missed by him. I said, “That was me too, Ellen never touched me like I wanted her to do. But Marcus does and it’s everything I’ve ever wanted.” Joe said part of his fantasy is being touched by me when we were naked in the pool. There it was finally, and he didn’t get all strange telling me that too. I don’t know why I didn’t just ignore that comment but his honesty kinda got to me and I said that part of my fantasy was the same about him. I kinda thought I better come up with something to cover that comment and told him about one night at the cabin when we were telling each other stuff we had kept secret from each other and were getting really horny and needed to go inside to take care of that. It was the second night at the campfire, the night before we both pissed out the fire from the opposite sides of the fire pit watching our pee stream glowing from the fire. The second night we did the same only side-by-side. I don’t remember which one of us got the idea of holding the other guys dick while peeing the fire out, but it was the first time we ever did that, and it was such a fucking turn-on. I could feel the pee coming through his dick and I just about came from that. Just about, not really.

Joe kinda had a little nervous laugh over my story, well me too you know. Like I don’t say stuff like that normally unless we are writing about it for the blog. But I’m glad we got this stuff outta our heads and maybe we’ll see what happens next. Maybe I gave Joe some new fantasy shit to jack off with and it will be all he needs, I hope so, but it got me wondering if I just gave him permission to grab my dick while in the pool. And if he does, what do I do about it. I don’t want to lose him as a good friend, and I don’t want Marc to get upset about it too. Maybe if Joe grabs both of our dicks at the same time, hahah. That’s a nervous laugh if you don’t know, Marc is gonna read this soon. You know a few years ago a guy came onboard my boat and did suck the both of us off in front of each other and we didn’t go crazy over it. Marc wrote about that a long time ago; I don’t know what chapter but it’s still online if you want to read about it. (I’ll see if I can find the chapter and let you know what one it is. I was able to locate the chapter for you it’s: https://brosgonerogue.blogspot.com/2019/04/ch-12-spoiler-unexpected-stuff-happens.html ) Anyway, Joe said if I didn’t mind that we keep our conversation to just ourselves and that maybe Al won’t be needed for now.

Actually, we got all of that in on two cups of coffee and he was thinking about getting to work even if it was only going to be 99 degrees outside that day. Actually, the weather app was wrong it got to 102 by 4:00pm. I hope poor Joe was outta the sun by then. I don’t think we are out of the woods on this topic yet, I have a feeling that Joe really wants to experience what it’s like with a guy or guys, IDK, we’ll see, I guess. I know one thing for sure, I’ll be having a conversation with Marc over this after he reads this chapter, actually I’m just saying that for you guys, we’ve been talking about this for a while and we both don’t know what to do yet. Maybe one of you guys will help us with your ideas. Anyhow, since it got so fucking hot out this summer, any daytime naked time in the pool hasn’t happened for Joe and us. The way it looks, it could be a long hot summer. Maybe one day, Joe could come over late at night if that’s what we want for all of us to experience. Or maybe that’s just my fantasy getting into print instead of just in my head. Could be you know.

Love you guys! Write me, my email is feeling sad and lonely.

Larry

Here is a link to the next posting:

https://brosgonerogue.blogspot.com/2023/09/please-read-this-inportant-update-from.html\